When are you TOO paranoid?

When pregnant with Bella, I had tons of moments where I'd worry she wasn't moving enough.  I'd go lay down or sit down and eat/drink something sweet and she'd start twirling around like usual.  Things were SO easy then.  I could not believe how incredibly lucky I was to have such an uneventful pregnancy.  I even got asked a couple of times if I felt cheated that I didn't have morning sickness or the little aches and pains as I started to get bigger.  My answer: HELL NO!  So long as that little girl was moving and kicking, that's all the pregnancy experience I needed to have.

This time around, I got to have the experience.  I am, again, extremely grateful that there hasn't been any problems with this second pregnancy.  But, instead of things being a walk in the park, I've been able to find out what it feels like to be nauseous all the time, feel like your hips are about to fall off, and the pain of a sweet little someone planting his foot into my ribs.  All the normal pregnancy complaints!  However, my paranoia about things like fetal movement and signs of labor have not gone away.  If anything, they've intensified.

First time around, I went into labor on my own less than a week after finding out that I'd already started dilate and prepare for labor.  This was shortly after I started to feel Braxton Hicks contractions (none of which were painful, or even that uncomfortable).  The moment I had any kind of fluid issues, I freaked out thinking my water had broke.  No such luck.  But less than 24 hours later, I went into labor 2 weeks early. 

This time, I've visited the hospital a total of 3 times.  The first I was sent by my nurse practitioner because of the decent amount of contractions I'd been having and the fact that I had begun to dilate (almost half way).  I knew I wasn't in labor, but that didn't mean that I wasn't going to be a complete basket case about when labor would start.  She put me on red alert.  I may not have been in labor yet, but it really was at the point that it could happen at anytime.  I've been like this for 3 weeks now.  I've also been to the hospital a second time for painful contractions (that went away thankfully) and then decreased fetal movement with a possible water breakage (he started beating my up shortly after I was hooked up to a monitor). 

The closer the induction date gets, the more paranoid I become.  I am literally driving myself crazy with worry.  I feel absolutely silly being so worked up over something I have no control over.  I have a pretty good idea of what labor feels like, so there's no need to jump to conclusions over things that I know aren't labor.  I have made it to the home stretch, there's no need to flip out now!  Advice to those of my friends who have control issues: enjoy your pregnancy (whether you be pregnant now or will be in the future) and trust your body.  You'll know if something is truly wrong.  Stressing out over the little things is just going to drive you bonkers!

Thursday is going to be here soon enough :).